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Santa Real, Also Dead Santa Real, Also Dead

Archeologists say they may have discovered the tomb of Saint Nicholas, a.k.a. Santa Claus, a.k.a. Father Christmas, a.k.a. Kris Kringle, underneath a church in Antalya, Turkey. So—a real good news, bad news situation. Ho ho ho!

Santa Triumphs Over DMV and Wins Right to 'Obscene' License Plate Santa Triumphs Over DMV and Wins Right to 'Obscene' License Plate

The War on Christmas is real and it’s happening at the Department of Motor Vehicles. Happily, Santa has won the most recent skirmish.

Viral Story About a Terminally Ill Child Dying in Santa's Arms Looks to Have Been a Ho Ho Hoax  Viral Story About a Terminally Ill Child Dying in Santa's Arms Looks to Have Been a Ho Ho Hoax 

One of the mysteries of the internet is that people really enjoy reading and sharing “heartwarming” content about horribly sad things, a genre previously shorthanded as grief porn. The latest entry is a part-time Santa in Tennessee, who claimed to a local newspaper columnist that a very sick little boy recently died…

Paper Forced to Close Comments On Mall Of America's First Black Santa Thanks to Racism Paper Forced to Close Comments On Mall Of America's First Black Santa Thanks to Racism

Earlier this week, the Minneapolis Star-Tribune ran a nice story about the Mall of America’s first black Santa. Larry Jefferson is a retired U.S. Army veteran from Texas, and his hope, along with the mall’s, was that he would serve as a “Santa for everyone.”

There's a Black Santa at the Mall of America For the First Time There's a Black Santa at the Mall of America For the First Time

For the first time ever, there’s a Black Santa at the Mall of America, here to teach children that fictional holiday figureheads come in all shades.

Portland's 'Hipster Santa' Rocks a Man Bun Portland's 'Hipster Santa' Rocks a Man Bun

This cool-ass Santa Claus in downtown Portland is a quote-unquote hipster with a man bun who wears a Drake-approved sweater, rides a bicycle and carries around a typewriter. Santa, baby. The only thing missing is a faux air of superiority and apathy.

There's a Man Named 'Santa Claus' Running for City Council in North Pole, Alaska There's a Man Named 'Santa Claus' Running for City Council in North Pole, Alaska

Specifically, the former president of the North Pole Chamber of Commerce, whose legal name really and truly is “Santa Claus.”

Here Are the Most Painful Ways to Learn That Santa Doesn't Exist Here Are the Most Painful Ways to Learn That Santa Doesn't Exist

I'm going to start with the story of how I learned that Santa didn't exist. It's not a happy story, as these types of stories generally aren't, but I'm laughing about it now. And I hope that the people whose stories were compiled into a list of painful revelations on Buzzfeed are laughing too. Or at least have a good…

Fuck Santa! Kirk Cameron's New Movie Gives Baby Jesus His Birthday Back Fuck Santa! Kirk Cameron's New Movie Gives Baby Jesus His Birthday Back

Let me tell you guys my idea of a perfect Christmas. You wake up like it's any other day—it might not feel like December 25, it might even feel like, say, August 27—you go to work, you eat your sandwich, you shoulder life's banality with the resignation of a much older woman, and then...someone sends you a link. You…

BFFs Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen Take World's Cutest Santa Photo BFFs Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen Take World's Cutest Santa Photo

I'm pretty sure that the only thing on this earth that I love more than the best-friendship of Sirs Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen is their GODDAMN BOWLER HATS. Clearly the pair has gotten wise to the public's love, because they keep feeding us amazing pics of themselves wining and dining and kicking it and…

Megyn Kelly Says White Santa Backlash Is Nothing But Race-Baiting Megyn Kelly Says White Santa Backlash Is Nothing But Race-Baiting

Remember last week when Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly insisted that Santa Claus was white? Well, it turns out that we should have been laughing this entire time because her comments were actually just a very well-constructed, not at all flawed and totally hilarious joke. Way to miss the punchline, IDIOTS.

Airline Plays Santa; I Sob With the Joy of Christmas Spirit Airline Plays Santa; I Sob With the Joy of Christmas Spirit

I know this is a cheesy marketing move meant to capitalize on my uterus (where I store my emotions! and candy! and seven remaining eggs!), but I DON'T CARE I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

Thousands of Santas Take Part In Annual Bar Crawl Thru NYC Thousands of Santas Take Part In Annual Bar Crawl Thru NYC

[NEW YORK, NY - DECEMBER 14: Revelers dressed as Santa Claus pose for a picture at Tompkins Square Park to take part during the annual SantaCon bar crawl event on December 14, 2013 in New York City. The SantaCon annual event occurs worldwide in more than 300 cities in 44 countries. In New York some community groups…

This Is the Harvard of Santa Schools This Is the Harvard of Santa Schools

There's a school in Michigan where Santas learn makeup application, reindeer maintenance, and how to keep elves from unionizing. What's more, these Kris Kringles come from all over the world — and many of them have attended the school multiple times. That's what Santa-style dedication looks like, muggles.

Some Jerks Want to Put Santa Claus on a Diet 'For the Children' Some Jerks Want to Put Santa Claus on a Diet 'For the Children'

I don't watch The Biggest Loser, because I am not entertained by inhumane misery factories that systematically force-feed fat people humiliation in the name of medically questionable body conformity and advertising megabucks. Just not my particular cup of power cleanse tea, per se. But apparently there was a dude on a…

Drunk Man Arrested For Telling Kids Santa Isn't Real, Being Hella Drunk Drunk Man Arrested For Telling Kids Santa Isn't Real, Being Hella Drunk

In what we can only imagine was cosplay of Dan Aykroyd's break down in Trading Places, a 24-year-old Canadian man was arrested for being super drunk and screaming at kids about how Santa's a fraud. Probably the most pertinent part is the being drunk and on parole, but still. Best part, it all went down during a…

How Exactly Does Santa Go Down All Those Chimneys In A Single Night? How Exactly Does Santa Go Down All Those Chimneys In A Single Night?

We've all wondered how exactly Santa Claus manages to deliver toys to millions of children around the world in just a single night. His journey clearly defies all logic, and yet each year otherwise rational adults go to great lengths to preserve the image of Santa Claus as a chimney-diving hero for the younger folks…

Absolutely Charming 100-Year-Old Letter To Santa Found In Chimney Absolutely Charming 100-Year-Old Letter To Santa Found In Chimney

While installing central heating in his Dublin, Ireland home, John Byrne found a letter to Santa Claus written in 1911 by two children, 10-year-old Hannah Howard and her 7-year-old brother Fred. The children placed the letter on a shelf inside their fireplace, and miraculously it remained there for decades and was…

Santas Gone Wild Santas Gone Wild

NEW YORK, NY - DECEMBER 10: Revelers dressed as Santa Claus sing near Battery Park during the annual SantaCon event December 10, 2011 in New York City. SantaCon is a mass gathering of revelers dressed as Santa Claus who take to the streets in cities across the country before Christmas. (Photo by Allison Joyce/Getty…

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